The Black Barbie Chronicles: The Return of Black Barbie

Hello 2021!  This year for the Black Barbie Chronicles the following will happen;

1. I am posting weekly (make sure to check)

2. Entries are newish, new, or reworked. (The content is all-good)

What I’m doing is posting my book in diary form here for weekly review. 

Like all good things, let’s start at the beginning and go from there.  Like all good beginnings, it starts with a boy. 

Enjoy the read.

F. M. Laster

“Never attempt to win by force what can be won by deception.”
― Niccolò Machiavelli

Friday September 4th

I miss you Hannu

Hannu, it’s been a while since I’ve thought about you. But no matter how I try to deny this, I know in my heart that this is not the truth; this is not how we end. I miss you; with every fiber of my being. Sometimes Hannu, I wake up in the middle of the night, want to talk to you and hear your voice. The urge to do that is so strong so I do the next best thing; drown my sorrows in a bottle of wine.  You know I can drink a bottle a night easily.  Imagine that Hannu.

My days, my days, I can handle, it’s the nights that are killing me; the longing, the aching, the wishing, the hoping, and the pleading.

My nights are long my love so long.  I find myself going to be later and later and also drunker and drunker.  At least I’m not cutting myself anymore.  You should be proud of me.  I’ve replaced one crutch for another. Alcohol is my new best friend and lover.

I really do miss you and can’t understand why did you leave me. Why did you leave me? Wasn’t’ I good enough for you. Wasn’t I?  Oh, my love, how I miss our conversations, I miss our jokes, and I miss our weird messages and pictures we would send each other. I miss you.

On a side note, I drove by your house yesterday. I must say my love you are looking good.

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